Published July 05, 2020 by with 0 comment

The Fear of Failure

Speaking about failures, we all think about the instances where we failed to achieve something. Instances where we tried but couldn't get the success. While trying something out, we tend to think either we will succeed, or we will fail.

But what we don't realize, people whom we see as successful, failed multiple times before making it through. And, they failed even more times than the ones who are unsuccessful. So, why do we think of failure as the opposite of success? This is not because of failure itself, but our fear of failure.

The difference between people who are successful versus those who just make it by, is their perception of failure. Successful people believe that failure is just one of the stepping stone to achieve success. They understand that they will come across a lot of failures, and it's simply the part of the process. They take learnings from these failures, and start trying again. The point at which people stop trying after seeing few failures, is when it becomes a roadblock to success.

Every now and then, we hear about success stories of people around us. People who made it big, be it in the field of science, sports or politics. We get to hear about what they achieved and how talented they are. We are mostly aware of their days of glory, and not so much of the time before they were "called" successful. We talk about the attempt that made them successful, but don't care about how many times they failed before. What we fail to realize it's their persistent efforts, and the "not giving up" attitude, that got them here.

When people say they are afraid that they won't succeed, it's not the fear of failure, but the fear of being judged by others. The fear of rejection, loss of dignity, or simply being perceived as not being good enough. Such people tend to say it before even trying, in order to lower the expectations. And with such fear in mind, they fail to even take the first step.

Why does this happen? This happens because of what we perceive as being successful. Success today is getting the recognition from others. Meeting the standards set by our society. This is seen from the time we start learning, when in exams we need to get a minimum passing mark, or we will be called a failure. And, even if the person manages to pass the exam in the next attempt, they are still forever tagged with this failure.

To overcome the fear of failure, we need to change how we perceive success. Success shouldn't be treated as a destination but perceived as a journey. Passing an exam is good but learning from mistakes and being persistent is also worth celebrating. When people let their failure get better of them is when they truly fail themselves.

Also, the idea is not to keep failing blindly until you reach your goal. But, take learnings from those failures, and understand why you failed in first place. It could be due to lack of experience or you didn't try hard enough. In the end, there is always a take away from the failures we face, which we should use to improve our next attempt.


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